My partner, Guo Jian, has been priming me for the “Moon Month” or to zuoyuezi 坐月子. When my in-laws were here a couple of weeks ago (the precursor to their more permanent visit that starts as of the 21st) and we were downstairs helping to unload the car, a perfect stranger saw my advanced pregnant shape, the presence of parental…   …read more.

I know this is a blog about my partnership and the courtship that eventually led to my decision to get married to this creature known as Guo Jian. But, if this is a full story then you sometimes need some sub characters. Guo Jian’s cousin is one of those characters. She plays a role in this story of identity, identity…   …read more.

Several years ago now, back when I was still living in Toronto in fact, a friend changed my whole world when it came to sushi. You see, I have been a vegetarian (of varying degrees) now for twenty-two years. Even before I stopped eating meat, though, I never ate seafood or fish, (unless they were frozen fish sticks as a…   …read more.

Back in the late 90’s, I used to nickname my mailing list “signees” this cute play on words: “M-Embers,” that is until a male friend made a joke about how much that nickname made him think about genitalia. I was mortified! I promptly stopped using that in my (then just postal) mailings about my shows. I’m admitting this because I…   …read more.

I am one day from 36 weeks pregnant. My due date is January 1st and so when I crept into December this week, I felt a little tingly at the thought of it just being one month away <gasp!> … ONE MONTH! Pregnancy is almost over (give or take a few weeks) and I’m soon going to meet Little Spark!…   …read more.

That spring of 2008 when I came to China to really see if we had a shot, when it came to the living situation, Guo Jian acted like a U-Haul lesbian. At least years of being surrounded by that community behaviour—where new lovers would move in together within a month or two—meant that I could recognize it, if nothing else….   …read more.

As I head to the end of my 34th week, I realize that I have lots to report regarding Little Spark and our soon-to-be expanded family… Last Sunday, our community here in Beijing threw us a baby shower. It was officially the first time that anyone’s ever thrown me a shower (of any kind) and I was so touched. I…   …read more.

So, as you have read by now, that December 2007, my long-term relationship ended. It created a cascade of closure crashing around me, the effects of which I liken to trying remain standing upright at the foot of a waterfall. By March, after a spontaneously cancelled Australian tour left a gap in our pre-booked show schedule, I bought another flight…   …read more.

So, I’ve been trying to write this blog entry for about 6 months now. I started it as “Things I Like About My Pregnant Body” because I was trying to be positive about all of the physical changes, especially in those first four months when I felt especially disgusting. It was a tactic to push myself towards the light, to…   …read more.

Sometimes it all has to fall apart for it to feel whole. It’s when you have nothing—nothing in the way you’ve been previously conditioned to value your worth—when you realize how much wealth you really possess. Sometimes it’s in the breaking that you finally heal, in your heart, in your sense of loving yourself or at least truly accepting yourself…   …read more.